Food for Thought: Innovation Menu for 2019
Food for Thought is my new pop-up restaurant where people who can think (our innovation experts) serve their ideas to people who can’t (everyone else).
The Next Big Thing
It’s different every day! Dip a genetically modified Quorn™ chip into “a new generation” grand statement from an opinionated innovation expert. Choice of three classic dressings: “Awesome”! “Amazing!” “Wow!”
Who said money doesn’t grow on trees? Our soup of the day is sourced from fresh trust trees, seeded from seedy software. Prices vary (a lot).
Sound cheesy but it really is the world’s first quantum computer-generated recipe. Made in 0.00001 nanoseconds, it takes a little longer to digest.
A relic from the olden days. A Nokia executive once said that “Although his strategy and tactics were unquestionably superb, Caesar was slain because of his own greatness.”
Very fishy, as are all blockchains. You are challenged to identify the ingredients and the logic that binds them and, if you get them all right, we will transfer ownership of our restaurant to you.
“Food for thought” keynotes are shorter and sharper than the over-hyped “Ideas worth spreading”. We spread our ideas on toast that is fired on charcoal by innovation experts who were fired from their real jobs. We deliver with pizazz and Powerpoint which, despite the trite phrase “death by Powerpoint”, has never actually caused anybody’s death. The only casualties are the reputations of the speakers themselves.
Think Tank Tandoori
We recycle old ideas in hot air form that is spicier and tastier than any of its rivals.
Barbecued Business Buzzwords
We shelved productivity, efficiency, quality management, re-engineering, benchmarking, best practices, back to basics and so on. Nowadays, we do entrepreneurship, ecosystems, technology, robotics, big data, disruption, culture, mistakes, failures and unleashing the creativity of the masses (eat your heart out Karl Marx!). Our intelligence is truly artificial, we all live in virtual reality and our ribs are finger-licking good!
Time Warp Wrap
The future is here and now! Wrapped in a leaf of fresh imagination which questions the meaning of time: our expert chefs assume you have infinite time to implement their wacky ideas and they argue in earnest when you explain why you don’t. They will often say “our ingredients are fresh and healthy and innovative and you know that if you don’t innovate you’ll die”.
Hummus “How to”
“How to be a great leader” meets “How to disrupt your business” meets “How to implement an action plan” meets “How to achieve perfect happiness and bliss”.
Hot Hackathon Hooch
Your choice of ice-cream in alcohol that takes 24 hours to ferment.
Not available, out of stock. Whatever is beyond the sell-by date is fed to our own innovation consultant-chefs.Patrons are advised that if they pay us in cash we’ll give them the change, or at least a roadmap to implement the change. Our motto is “The only thing that never changes is the fact that we are always telling people they have to change and they won’t.”
May your New Year be Creative and full of Good Health! To this end eating organic won’t help, but looking left and right before you cross the road will.
Happy New Year!
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Dimis Michaelides, Managing Director at Performa Consulting, is global business consultant and keynote speaker on The Art of Innovation. His book, The Art of Innovation: Integrating Creativity in Organizations, was published in 2007.